“Don’t care about the outcome.”
This is common advice offered about the mental game of pool and in various life situations. It is conceptually similar to the idea that trying too hard produces poor results. When you desire something badly, you’re told to let it go because being too eager repels what you want.
But you do care. Not caring is a myth. Anybody engaged in an activity cares about it, or at least cares about the benefit it provides them.
You wouldn’t be playing, arguably, the hardest game in the world if you didn’t care about what you would get out of it. You would have given up the moment things didn’t go your way.
At key moments in a match, I encourage myself not to care about the result. But sometimes, this causes me to put less care into my shot execution. I’m trying to avoid overthinking so I’ve done the opposite. Whether it’s self-sabotage or a growing pain, I’m struggling to find the balance between to care or not to care.
When I’m disappointed with my results, pretending not to care is a disservice to my authentic self. The more I let myself feel the disappointment, the quicker I get over it.
When Caring Becomes A Problem
“Caring” becomes a problem when you judge yourself harshly and let it take away from your self-worth. I’m challenged to remember that no matter the results today, it doesn’t draw from my authentic self or my soul’s calling.
While ranting about caring, I realized that I was unintentionally questioning some stoic concepts. Stoicism is often misunderstood as not caring about anything, but you must care about the things within your control. Stoicism is knowing that happiness does not come from people or other external factors.
The only sustainable happiness comes from within and through fulfilling our human nature, which lies in our intelligence and sociability. We are the most intelligent species because of our sociability. Discussing and sharing ideas is part of our human nature. Conversations, taking in wisdom, and sharing my struggles are all expressions of my human nature.
Pool as a Spiritual Practice?
As I mentioned, I’m constantly taking in ideas from the people around me and applying them when they fit.
I’m learning how to play pool spiritually at the advice of a more advanced player. I thought this was odd when I first heard it, but it makes perfect sense. For example, books on the mental game of pool weave in spiritual practices like mindfulness, nonjudgment, and purpose without specifically calling them out as such.
Here is another sagacity for spiritual pool play that I heard this week.
The way you treat yourself when you make a mistake makes all the difference.
I’m cutting back on caring by reducing my reactions to mistakes in gameplay. The less I react, the less weight they have.
Can you let a mistake go quickly or do you punish yourself, either mentally or physically?
It’s much easier to accept success than it is to accept failure. In the moment it’s tough, but as you sit with it, you’ll see that failure breeds innovation and creativity (like this article). Embracing failure is good for your soul.
Of course I care about the outcome. My growth lies in what I do when I don’t get what I want.
If you like my content and want to support me in its creation, here are a few ways to do so:
- Give this article a clap and become a follower
- Subscribe to be notified when I post new stuff
- Consider buying me a game of pool or downloading my Tournament Performance Tracker
- Consider becoming a monthly supporter
Pocket Watch: A blog to share the lessons learned about the mental game of pool and billiards written by a competitive pool player on her road to pro. (#09)
